Our words have Power

Its a common phrase, with many variations, "your words have power". But listen ma'am, THEY DO. It's as plain and simple as that.

I was watching my second oldest recently, really struggling day after day. His behavior was going downhill, and frankly, I was getting flustered.

But upon reflection I realized he was drowning in mine and my husbands words. As a parent it can be hard to navigate correcting our children without crushing them, but it CAN be done.

Even when day after day my son is continuing to make the same poor choices, my words are my responsibility and they MATTER.

"Every day your room is a mess, your becoming a messy person"

is received VERY differently than

"Listen, I'm daily checking your room and its been messy, but you ARE able to maintain a clean room"

Proverbs 18:21, says our tongue holds the power of death and life.

Speaking life and strength and 'able-ness", builds up, pointing out everything one does wrong, tears them down.

Now lets go one step further..

SAME THING with our men . Now I know, I know...I know every thought, because I've probably thought it too, and maybe even done it.

How will our hubbies know if we don't tell them? They should know!. I have a right to speak up for myself, I don't deserve that!

And this is where we have to lay it down, PICK UP OUR CROSS, and trust the LORD.

Matthew 16:24 says we are to lay ourselves down / deny ourselves and pick up our cross and follow Him. In our daily lives and routines our cross and laying ourselves down just might be lived out in our relationships as moms and wives.

I can't even try to deny it because bible verse after bible verse comes to knock down every argument I might try.

We build our men up with our words or tear them down.

We trust the Lord with our husbands or we don't.

We choose sacrificial Christ like love, or we don't.

Every time, and listen I do mean E-V-E-R-Y time, I choose selfishly in this department, I suffer. Every time I choose to trust the Lord, I am so much better off.

Sure our husbands could pick up their clothes better, or take out the trash sooner, or help with bedtime routines more.

But woman! Have you ever felt motivated and encouraged to do more because someone sat around and pointed out how bad you are doing or how much you are lacking??

Because not me. Nope.

Gentle encouragement makes a lot more gains then harsh judgments

Gentle encouragement builds up

TRY IT!!!

Instead of "you put the diaper on backwards", try: "thanks for changing the babies diaper"

Instead of "you never..." try, "I'm so thankful for when you.."

Instead of "You never take out the trash when I ask" , the next time he DOES take it out try "Babe thank you so much, I really appreciate that!"

Highlight what They do right, not wrong

Highlight what your thankful for, not frustrated with.

Point out every good thing, and before speaking on the bad , bring it to the Lord in prayer... and then, LEAVE IT THERE!!!!!!!

It is amazing how much changes.

Be patient , wait on the Lord, let Him work.

It is incredible how He changes our hearts and our eyes while growing our husbands.

Easier said than done, the struggle is real haha.. But that is where we get to rely on the Goodness of God.

Phil 4:13, every one knows it, but I don't think we really understand the depth , the power, and the application of this verse in our day to day lives.

I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength. ALL things, it applies to even the words we say (or don't).